Teens Don't Dance
by Paulagirl
Summary: Like the movie, and inspired from "Cats Don't Dance" this is a KND spoof... Hoagie is a Teen with one dream: to make it in Hollywood with an acting career. Abby is a teen who knows how everything goes, and Cree....read to find out ;
1. Prolouge

(( Hello, 'tis me! Yeah, starting another story and I haven't even finished the first one I've ever made...poo. Lol. Anyway, this idea was inspired by this forum I was on. Personality wise, Hoagie makes a good Danny, and Abby for Sawyer...as for the rest, I'll have to think hard on that.

Disclaimer: I do not own Kids Next Door in anyway possible, nor do I own Cats Don't Dance..and using the ideas from this story is wrong and is evil....have fun reading though!

So, without further ado, I give you...))

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_**Teens Don't Dance**_

_**Prologue**_

_A place where dreams can come true...does such a place even exist? _

_Yes. And it's name, is Hollywood. In this city, one can find many opportunities to be in shows, plays, musical numbers....even T.V. Sitcoms. But, they would have to be an adult. Well, at the very least adults would have the starring and more important roles. Even if a teen or a kid could be lucky enough to land a role, it would be small and insufficient. Usually they worked behind scenes with menial regular jobs, like secretaries or sub-sub-pre-author, only wishing to have the same limelight as the adults received. It would never come true of course, for one has to be at least 20, out of the "teens" literally...._

_Now, we take a look on on particular rising movie star, Cree Lincoln. She was one of the most famous, beloved and well known stars, all at the mere age of 22. She had everything: cars, limos, jets, a mansion, franchising best-sellers....even singing bobble-heads. Her faithful servant and friend, Chad, would agree she had everything a person would want. Even he as well, achieved some fame, but was content with her getting the most of it. _

_Then we take a look on the other side of the United States, more specifically, in the mid-western region. In Cleveland, Ohio, there was a boy. This boy was at the age of 17, clearly under the 'adult' age, but was determined to seek his fortune in Hollywood...the poor guy. On his way to the local Greyhound-Bus-Station, many of his friends and family members gave him many objects, to bring him luck of course. As he stood on the steps of the Greyhound bus, he called out to his farewell-party with these words:_

"I'll be famous, or my name's not Hoagie P. Gilligan, Jr.!"

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((So, what do you think? Please read and review!)


	2. Chapter 1: Hoagie's Arrival

((A/N: I'm baaack.. lol, time for the next chapter...

Oh, and _this_ is singing parts, and actions/ speaking is this... just a future reference, since this spoof is a musical somewhat

Disclaimer: I don't own KND, or CDD...though I would like a plushie :3

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_**Teens Don't Dance**_

_**Chapter 1: Hoagie's Arrival**_

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The day began slowly, as the sun peeked from the trees in the horizon, casting it's glow upon the bus that was making it's way across the highway. On this bus, some of the passengers where just waking up slowly, save the man driving the bus...and of course, the boy who had been up about two hours ago. His name, was Hoagie.

He watched through the window for the past five days, across country, switching greyhound buses when necessary. He, and the passengers as well, passed mountains, monuments...even road-side grannies who took about five hours just crossing the road. Except for that last part, Hoagie loved every part of the trip.

"Wow," he whispered, his eyes gazing upon the huge letters in the distance that clearly spelled: HOLLYWOOD. "I finally made it," Hoagie sighed, getting back into his seat with a grin, and he grabbed his suitcase.

By the time they were on main street, the sky began to glow brighter, it's bluish tint growing lighter into a daytime color, and as Hoagie got off the bus, he could've sworn today was his day, for as if on cue, the sun's light shone right on him like a spotlight.

With all of this splendor, Hoagie slowly took off his hat, with his yellow-lensed goggles attached, and began to sing. Meanwhile, a boy who resembled a 13-year-old version of himself, was trying to lift a block of ice onto a trolley...

_Hoagie: "Since I was a little boy, I had a dream. My name in lights: Hoagie the Song and Dance Guy!" _

He paused, seeing the boy struggling with the ice. Instantly, he rushed over and helped him lift it onto the trolley-cart.

_Hoagie:"Got on a bus, and came to a town where dreams can come true. It's gonna happen for me, it could happen for you.". _

He pointed to the 13-year-old, who looked confused.

"Who me?" He asked. Then, he followed Hoagie into a courtyard, where Hoagie began to dance a bit. There was something about this guy that triggered his memory a bit. Maybe it was the lack of sunlight or it was probably just too early.

_Hoagie: "You. Can. Do anything if you try. The most impossible dream can come true, if you believe it! This is my kind of town, which is clear as the nose on your face". WOW! _

By now, the two of them made their way back to where they first met, and as a car pulled to a stop at the red light, a comedian well known, Dave Chappelle, poped his head out and took a picture. Hoagie looked back towards the boy, still a little oblivious to their similarity.

_Hoagie: "This is the time!"_

The boy in response danced a little, and then pointed towards Hoagie.

_Hoagie: "This is the place."_

Again, the 13 year-old danced once more, before pointing at Hoagie.

_Hoagie: "This is the time. So, this must be the place!" _

"So long," the boy called out, as Hoagie waved him good-bye, heading towards a taxi-cab that had just pulled up. Once he was inside, the car was off. Too bad he didn't happen to notice a girl about his age, with dark skin and long wavy black hair, trying to reach the same cab.

"TAXI," she cried, but the car was long gone. "Crud."

Hoagie stood on top of the Taxi and began to sing out loud, gesturing to everything around him.

_Hoagie: "Hollywood! Where the streets are paved with gold, where the dream never gets old, in Hollywood. Hollywood! Where the stars don't shine at night..." _

The taxi stopped, as an actress walked across the street, who was revealed to be Keira Knightly, only to pause and take a picture before walking the rest of the street.

_Hoagie: "They walk around in the broad daylight, in Hollywood." _

The car stops once again, this time, Hoagie sees a billboard behind them advertising a new movie that would be shooting on one of the lots. Positioning himself just right, he acted as the man who was in the scene with a girl, and caressed the air--though to an observer it looked like he caressed the girl, for the advertisement clearly showed a love-scene from the movie.

_Hoagie: "Dig. That. Face. There's nothing like this in any-place. Right off, the movie screen. If you know what I mean!" _

Finally though, Hoagie got off the cab (literally) and handed the 16-year-old that was driving his money before heading down the street towards a building that was putting up the letters that would spell the name of the upcoming movie. Deciding to lend a hand, he set his suitcase down and handed them each letter, while still singing.

_Hoagie: "Look. At. Me. I'm going to be the guy. To. See. I'm going down in his-to-ry! Just watch me!" _

After helping the men with their work, Hoagie passed by a famous movie-star hangout, and walked by the windows where he could see a lot of the stars through. As he imitated each one-- the first, doing a moon-walk while seeing Micheal Jackson, the next being Angelina Jolie-Pitt, he pursed out his lips while batting his eyes-- an adult guard saw him trespassing and tried to catch him. He too, was caught up in the fame of the stars and paused once to take a picture with Angelina Jolie-Pitt, before chasing after Hoagie again.

Then, he did catch him, but unfortunately for him..rather, fortunately for Hoagie, a trolley passed by, and Hoagie easily grabbed onto it, before riding on it's roof.

_Hoagie: "Ba-da-bee-bop. Ba-bad-ba-ba-ba!" _

While singing to himself, he played about with the electrical wires on the trolley, having fun with the sparks that rained down a bit. He jumped and danced about on it's roof. Meanwhile, the same girl who had tried to catch his cab before, was now riding the same trolley he was dancing on, and his actions had made her spill the rootbeer she was trying to drink, all over her blue-top.

She huffed. "Man..."

Once the trolley had stopped, Hoagie tapped the electric cord that connected the car to the wiring above, making more electrical showers rain, but of course, our favorite girl had just had to look outside her window to see what was going on...only to have the same sparks singe the tip on the brim of her red cap.

She frowned, while peeling the singed bits off.

Hoagie, still the ever-joyful and optimistic, hopped off the roof and went into the courtyard infront of another building, only to stop and dance in front of this one again.

_Hoagie: "Hollywood. Where the streets are paved with gold. Where the dream never gets old...Right here in Holly. . .Wood!" _

As he danced, the girl was right behind him, trying to get past, but his movements made her back into the fountain, and eventually fall right into it backwards.

Kicking his heels together, Hoagie walked care-free into the building that read: Maurice Johnson, Teen and Kid Actors Agency, not knowing that he was gaining the all-powerful, yet ineffective glare from the girl in the fountain.

As she stared at him through her now soaked, slightly singed hat, she guaranteed herself that she would never, ever try to come into contact with him again, even if it was the last thing she did.

However, she'd be dead wrong....

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((Okay, so, how was that? Anyone got any ideas as to who were the characters our Hoagie had came into contact on his first day? If you guess right, you'll get invisi-brownies!

Please, read and review!))


	3. Chapter 2: What Do You Mean By Partners?

((A/N: Yeah, so they never really mentioned Numbuh 19th Century's name, so I named him Phillip...what? He looks like a Phillip to me. and here's Chapter 3!

Disclaimer: I don't own KND or CDD...or else I'd have millions....w00t!

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Teens Don't Dance

Chapter 2: The Way Things Are

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As Hoagie stepped inside, a big grin plastered on his face, he called out a loud, "HELLO!"

The teens and kids that were inside only regarded him; some with blank stares, others with a scowl or confused expression. To this, he only shrugged as he walked over to a couch where there were five other teens about his age sitting there. There was a couple who seemed to be in a debate. Both of them were red-heads, although the boy's hair was a light tone. Next to them, watching with a bemused look, was a blond girl, who was wearing an aqua-blue top with an orange skirt. Then, there was an asian girl who wore a green top with a black skirt, who was trying to show something to her counter-part: a blond-bowl-cut boy, looking as though he didn't even really care.

Walking over towards them, Hoagie waved towards them. The only ones who actually waved back were the blond girl and the asian one. "Hi there, I'm Hoagie."

The green-wearing girl only beamed before shaking Hoagie's hand excitedly.

"Hi Hoagie! I'm Kuki. That's Rachel," she pointed towards the blond girl, who waved in turn.

"That's Fanny and Phillip, or 'Pip' for short." The red-headed couple only shrugged, before going into another debate.

"And that's Wally," she finished, gesturing towards the boy with the blond hair. When she was done, Hoagie had to repeat each of the names to make sure he could remember them. As he did so, he made a motion to sit down on the couch, but Wally quickly moved to take up the vacant spot.

"WALLY!" Kuki fumed, before giggling. "Oh don't worry about him, Hoagie...he's just being a mister Cranky-pants today." And with that, she raised her right leg and kicked Wally back to the edge of the couch, leaving the poor adolescent in a knocked-out daze.

Hoagie smiled as he took the seat, " thanks!"

"So, I'm guessing you're not from around here, are you?" Rachel asked, looking around Kuki towards him.

"Well, no. But I came here because I heard that Maurice Thompson gives good parts for guys like us."

Fanny only sniffed. "If you call being a murdered child's body a good part."

Hoagie could only blink as a thought of him playing as a dead body phased through his mind....that wasn't a pretty picture, so he shook it out of his mind. Taking off his hat, he pulled out a piece of notebook paper that had some of his scribbles on it. He took a pencil and checked off the box that was next to the words: Monday- Go to Hollywood.

Kuki and Rachel both looked over his shoulder. "What's that," Kuki questioned him.

"Oh this? Well, it's this plan I've got. I figure, that if I work really hard, then I'll land my first big role and be famous by Friday." He looked towards the lot of them, and added, " well that's what worked for you guys, right?"

Rachel and Kuki gave eachother both worried glances, while Wally could only smirk. Fanny and Pip both eyed eachother before shrugging. "Sure...why not Thursday?"

Hoagie nodded to himself as he put the piece of paper into his back pocket. "Great!"

Kuki spoke once more. "Well Hoagie, you'd better let Mr. Johnson know that you're here. There's this new Camp Movie coming up...lots of roles for Kids!" Hoagie nodded and jumped up from his seat, walking into the office.

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As he had walked into the office, a man about the age of 20 was looking through some papers, trying to figure out some of his actors' creditials when he stumbled on the cast list for the new Camp Movie.

"Looks like everything's in order-- crud!" He noticed that near the bottom, he was still missing two more teens: a boy and a girl. Normally, this wouldn't have been a problem for him, but it was since practically every kid/teen in Hollywood had already gotten a part. Unless another teen boy walked in through the door, along with a girl, Maurice Johnson was sunk.

"Hello?"

Maurice looked up from the table, and from the look in his eyes, one would've thought he found the stairway to heaven. "Hello there. I assume you're looking for a role?"

"Yeah! Do you have one for me?"

"Well...how'd you like to be in the next, Cree Lincoln movie?"

Immediantly, stars and hearts appeared on Hoagie's glasses. "_The_ Cree Lincoln? The most beautiful, sucessful, and generous person alive?"

"The very one. Are you in?"

Hoagie nodded and handed him an already filled out resume. Maurice only took the paper lightly as he only wanted to get Hoagie to sign on as quickly as possible....

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Meanwhile, a dark-skinned girl, who was clearly soaked and parts of her hat singed, walked in the door. Her face had a look that said: Try to make fun of this, and you die.

Kuki gasped, being one of the first to see her. "Abby! What happened to you?"

Pip glanced while asking, "don't tell me you broke a mirror." Fanny only sighed at his comment, muttering under her breath, "I'd wish ye stop being so super-stitious"

Wally lifted an eyebrow. "Have you looked in one lately?"

Abby merely took off her jacket, wrung the remaining water out of her dark blue jersey and red hat, while walking over towards her secretary desk. "Let's just say, Abby's had a run in with karma in teenager boy form."

Rachel eyed the door where Hoagie was still talking to Maurice. "Let me guess...Tall and lanky?"

"Yep."

"Messy auburnish brown hair, wearing a baseball cap and yellow sunglasses?"

"How'd you know?"

"Nothing...just call it a girl's intuition," Rachel shrugged. She gave a wink towards Kuki, who winked back in reply. Kuki got up from the couch and ran towards Abby, standing behind her while she was in her own seat, and began straightening out her hair.

Abby, however was on the phone talking with a man, but she soon caught Kuki's messings. When she had gotten off, she looked up towards the girl. "Kuki...what are you doing, girl?"

"Oh, just fixing up your hair. You'll probably want to look pretty!"

Abby sighed before getting up, picking up her papers as she went towards the filing cabinent. "Huh. That'll be the day...the same day when Abby leaves this place. Honestly, why do I come here every day?"

"For the glamour?" Fanny inquired.

"Yes, the glamour of filing...the romance of typing," Abby pretended to swoon. This gained only some giggles from Rachel, Fanny...and Pip.

Pip looked around. "Abby's right, Francine..this place's a geek-fest....no offense, Herb." Another boy, around the age of 16, shrugged as he fixed his pocket-protector.

"None taken."

"But what if you meet someone nice? You'll want to look pretty then," Kuki pressured on.

As she was walking towards her desk again, about to reach something on the dresser near Maurice's office, Abby sighed. "It's not like some guy's gonna waltz right through that door, and--"

_**SLAM!**_

Maurice and Hoagie strolled out of the office, casually while Hoagie was laughing at a joke he told earlier. "Get it? 'Chesse to meet you'! That was classic!"

The older man could only look off to the side, not really getting the joke. _Hopefully, this boy acts better than he tells jokes!_ he thought to himself. "Now, just go to Studio 68D and you'll be all set."

Hoagie sighed in satisfaction, before walking towards the couch to tell his new friends about the new job he had gotten. Maurice looked about the room, still thinking on his dillemmia. He had gotten the last boy, but he needed a teen girl to be his counterpart.

Finally, his eyes rested upon his secretary, who had just came from out of the door-- trying to regain her composure with the abrupt slam she had gotten. "Oh Abby?" He called in a sweet-sounding voice.

Abby patted down her shirt, before looking at Maurice. Eyeing the grin he had, Abby raised an eyebrow. "Whatever it is, the answer's 'no'."

Maurice went up to her and laid his hands on her shoulders. "Please? It'll do me a big favor...it's only one part, just a small one, okay?"

Abby looked away, her arms crossed while she thought on this. "All right, fine. But only if I get Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays off..."

"Deal."

She grinned at her bargin, while Maurice took Hoagie by his shoulder and presented him. "And here's your partner!"

Abby's eyes widened at the sight of him, and in a instant, she turned away. "FORGET IT!"

"Nuh-uh, Abby. A deal's a deal! He's new in town, so I want you to be nice." As he said this, Maurice took Abby by the shoulders, turned her around, and shoved her into the unexpected arms of Hoagie.

Light blue eyes hidden behind yellow lens, met with dark amber brown ones.

"Wow...you're..." Hoagie, for the first time in his life, was at a loss for words...until he realized how wet her clothes were.

"Oh my gosh, you're soaking wet!" It was a good thing that Hoagie had let her go, or by the way her hands looked, she was going to wring his neck.

"Is it raining outside," he went on, now trying desperately for conversation, though Abby stayed quiet. "It was sunny when I came in." The two of them walked towards the front door as Abby was anxious to get this over and done with.

Hoagie went on with random bits of quotes, shutting the door behind them, only to notice it caught part of Abby's long, slightly loose, yet braided, ponytail....resulting her to scream out in agony.

"Heh heh...Sorry?" Hoagie opened the door so Abby could get the rest of her hair, and then he closed it once more.

Laughing at the whole scene, Wally sat up, now taking some interest. "And, it begins."


End file.
